There are many articles on this subject, and many have something interesting to say about it. However, the subject has turned into something of a cash cow when it comes to getting traffic to your website, and many tell at least partially a fairy tale because that’s what people want to hear. So that’s why I am writing about this as well… NOT!
Many people will not like to hear the truth about purpose. Only those who don’t wish to suffer unnecessarily in the search for a non-existent idealistic purpose, and find their actual purpose instead, will significantly benefit from what I’m about to explain. Fortunately, this will be a short article, so there is hardly any time lost in reading it.
Expectations
The most important thing to know about purpose is that it finds you. Looking for it yourself usually means that you create expectations as to what it might look like, how it will feel when you find it, etcetera. In practice, that makes it harder to recognize your actual purpose because you discard anything that doesn’t adapt to your expectations.
When you look at the hero’s journey, it starts with the ‘ordinary world’. It is the situation of ‘not searching for it’. Actively searching, would remove a prerequisite for the purpose to be noticed when it shows its face because what you are looking for is yet unknown to you. The chances of looking in the right place and recognizing it (if you are lucky enough to find it) are minimal.
When purpose shows its face, we have arrived at step two of the hero’s journey, called ‘the call to adventure’. It doesn’t say ‘finding adventure’, but even the romantically inclined purpose-finder might accept these two first steps. The third stage of the hero’s journey usually has them step of the train because it’s ‘the refusal of the call’. “Wait a minute! Refuse my purpose? No way!” Sorry, but… way!
Be aware that…
As I said before, our purpose typically finds us, but just because it’s your purpose, does not mean you have to like it or even recognize it. There’s often no ‘love at first sight’, but rather the opposite. The call is often found in the things you don’t like, something that bothers or even hunts you.
Our preferences create significant misunderstandings about purpose. Your purpose often becomes noticeable in what you resist, and not in what you like and prefer! This has to do with the fundamental source for all true purpose, namely to become conscious. Idyllic situations usually put people in a kind of dream state, creating the opposite of consciousness, so it’s only logical that if our purpose is consciousness, it will not come in the form of a ‘hobby’.
Why does purpose have to be about consciousness? The learning process involved is encrusted within the archetypical hero’s journey and with good reason. Humanity is evolving away from the animal world, and at some point in the past, the animals also started to move beyond a plant-like life and consciousness.
The general direction this shows is that of consciousness-evolution, which is also seen in the evolution of simple animals to very complex beings. That is still the drive for humanity as well, and the hero’s journey reflects that direction in an archetypical form.
Now I’m found
So, how do you find your personalized purpose? You don’t. It finds you, but you can prepare yourself so you will be ready to recognize it when it calls your attention. That doesn’t mean you won’t feel an initial resistance, and even when you have already started your hero’s journey, you will probably encounter doubts and thoughts of giving up.
You can start by asking yourself this question: What is it that you resist, but comes back to haunt you after a while? You can write down several situations that scare you, bother you, irritate you. All you have to do in the first step is to get them as conscious as possible, and not push them away.
Another thing you can do is to become conscious of why you wanted to find a purpose in the first place? Do you have the feeling something is missing in your life? Are the things you resist and whatever you feel you are missing in any way related? For example, sometimes people feel they miss a real connection with other people, but they resist opening up themselves and are bothered because other people don’t open up to them. They project their problem into (their perception of) other people’s behavior and are not willing (or able) to take the first step.
What will purpose do for me?
Most people searching for a purpose in life go wrong in their beliefs about what their purpose will do for them and how it will make them feel. If you feel the need for that, then the real reason behind finding your purpose will be ‘how it makes you feel’. After all, purpose means ‘the reason for which something is done or created’.
In his book “The Surrender Experiment”, Michael A. Singer describes his own hero’s journey, and much of how true purpose found him. An essential part of his evolution regarding consciousness has to do with realizing that ‘likes’ and ‘dislikes’ can be very deceptive if they are misunderstood, and followed blindly.
Another interpretation that relates to purpose offers a more realistic insight into what we are dealing with. A sense of purpose means ‘a person’s sense of resolve or determination’, and you will need that to succeed in the hero’s journey. Many feel the lack of purpose because they are not motivated within their current situation. This means that they lack a ‘sense of purpose’ in their current life situation.
A better life
A sensation of futility activates many people to search for their purpose, but trying to move away from that sensation, is not going to offer you a better life. Sadly, the negative sensation is self-made. Our feelings are usually a result of how we judge our situation. Especially when we don’t control our circumstances, which happens quite often, we start feeling the need for a purpose, but we look for it outside of us.
Looking for solutions outside of you for sensations that come from inside, is hugely counterproductive. We create the problem within, so the solution also comes from within. Making your inner life dependent on your external situation is a (known) recipe for unnecessary suffering. If you truly want a better life, you will want more control over what creates the conditions for a better life, and those are your thoughts about your life.
“There is really nothing you have to do, there is nothing you need, there is not place you have to go, there is no special book you have to read, there is no special teacher you have to see. This is between you and yourself.”
—Robert Adams
“Whatever happens to you, you can either see it as a curse and suffer it, or you can see it as a blessing and make use of it.”
—Sadghuru
“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation, but your thoughts about it.”
—Eckhart Tolle
And last, but not least:
“Your inner purpose is to awaken. It is as simple as that. You share that purpose with every other person on the planet – because it is the purpose of humanity.”
—Eckhart Tolle
